I Don't Like Soda, it Tastes Disgusting

Monday, February 25, 2013

I'm a picky eater and one of the discussions I have all the time is about how I don't like soda. It's an unpopular opinion, I know, but it is what it is. The same applies for ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise, pickles, so on and so forth. By far the biggest of the bunch, though, is the soda issue.

You'd be surprised how often not liking soda can become bothersome. As a child, there were incalculable amount of times where I would have to opt to drink nothing with a meal because nothing other than soda was available to me. This has become more relaxed over the years with the bottled water insanity going around, but there was a time where a situation like another kid's birthday party consisted of no alternatives. What kids aren't sucking down bottles of soda left and right?

This brings up another point: the wide range of sodas. Everyone has their favorite. They might be a Coca-Cola loyalist or they might take the Pepsi Challenge. Do you like Sierra Mist or do you like Sprite? Where does Dr. Pepper come into play? For someone like myself who doesn't like ANY type of soda, when you bring that point up to other people, they undoubtedly run down the list and ask you if you like any different brands. This guy couldn't possibly dislike every single carbonated drink out there...could he?

List of all the types of soda products
Not a winner in the bunch

But I do. It's also even one of the reasons I don't drink liquor (though the inebriation and peer pressure aspects far outweigh the taste problem). To me, the carbonation is just too overpowering. Every sip of every single soda drink I have ever tried has just tasted like it burned my tongue and mouth. It never quenches my thirst in the slightest bit and I don't even have the tolerance to taste the artificial flavoring added to it because the burning sensation pushes that in the background.

Whether it's caffeine free soda, zero calorie diet soda, any kind of flavorings, or even flat to compensate for the carbonation, I've quite literally never had a single sip of soda that I've ever enjoyed in the slightest bit. In a way, it's a good thing. Soda is incredibly unhealthy for you, as we've all been told, and this has given me the ability to avoid that problem. Granted, I've counteracted it by eating a piss poor diet and not exercising or getting much sleep, so I'm not any better off than the rest of you if I'm not in fact unhealthier for those other reasons. In the end, it's just another one of those things that seems to separate me from the majority, for better or worse, which causes some awkwardness but also some interesting things to think about. I fully expect nearly everyone to disagree with me on this issue, though, so commence the arguing.

Are you also not a fan of soda? Do you think it's ridiculous that I'm not? Leave a comment below!



This site is dead and has been for a long while, for multiple reasons—not the least of which is that it's of a different era (roughly 2007). You can no longer safely play around with discussing gray areas with a humorous twist. People don't read between the lines. If they want to be offended, they'll twist what you said to mean whatever they want, and you're guilty no matter what. Or, on the flip-side, instead of being too sensitive, they'll think you're somehow defending their awfully bigoted or shameful viewpoints, even if you aren't. Both extreme sides of everything are so black/white dumb that it's an impossible minefield to navigate. If anything on here doesn't age well, sorry; times have changed, and so do people, for better or worse. Get over it. (It being "everything") There is always more important shit out there going on. Out on limbs.



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