Marry, Fuck, or Kill: Community

Friday, September 24, 2010

While watching the season premiere of Community, in which part of the plot involved the protagonist choosing between different women, it got me thinking about who I'd pick.

Thus, I decided to start the first edition of MARRY / FUCK / KILL.

If you're unaware of how this game works, you pick 3 people and you have to assign them one of those labels. You can't use the same label twice and you can't opt out for one of the people.

That being said, this is the conclusion I came up with, when comparing the three principle female characters of Community: Annie, Britta, and Shirley.

KILL: Shirley

The only one of the three that I don't find attractive, plus she's too old for me. Nuff said.

FUCK: Britta

Britta's hot, but she's kind of a bitch. The whole "rogue" thing she has going on is lame. Plus, she can't pronounce "bagel" correctly. She's definitely hot, though, so she gets the fuck category.

MARRY: Annie

She's hot...hotter than Britta in my mind. On top of that, she's closer to my age, the character is the smartest of the bunch, and she's the least bitchy. She's also clearly the cutest (remember: cute doesn't necessarily mean hot or pretty; cute is a personality trait). Therefore, she wins in all categories and needs to be the one that would get the 1st place trophy, and I'd marry the crap out of her.

Suggestions of new groups of people for future entries are always welcome. Also, vote below on what you'd pick!




This site is dead and has been for a long while, for multiple reasons—not the least of which is that it's of a different era (roughly 2007). You can no longer safely play around with discussing gray areas with a humorous twist. People don't read between the lines. If they want to be offended, they'll twist what you said to mean whatever they want, and you're guilty no matter what. Or, on the flip-side, instead of being too sensitive, they'll think you're somehow defending their awfully bigoted or shameful viewpoints, even if you aren't. Both extreme sides of everything are so black/white dumb that it's an impossible minefield to navigate. If anything on here doesn't age well, sorry; times have changed, and so do people, for better or worse. Get over it. (It being "everything") There is always more important shit out there going on. Out on limbs.



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